Our orders came in on Thursday, which means I can actually start doing what I need to do: three different household shipments, ship the minivan, cancel utilities, pass a driving test for Germany, tell the post office, the banks, the utilities I'm not canceling, get shot records, passports (on the way), a short-term place to live over there until Gary vacates his house, turn my projects over at work, clean the house, buy suitcases for the kids...
Endless.
Sometimes I wonder in what way people are judging me about this. I'm pretty sure my family is tentatively happy for us. Tentative, of course, because everyone will miss us (especially the children) for two years. But I can't help but wonder if some people think I'm crazy for doing this.
Move my family out of the country for two years?! Why? I'm not a missionary who NEEDS to travel. I'm not getting paid an inordinate sum of money to do this. Sure there will be some benefits for the family, but the risk. The risk!
Honestly, when I think too hard about doing this, I get a little bit sick to my stomach. My stomach does flip-flops and I feel the need to push some panic down fast. That causes me a little bit of shame because, as a friend from my past (and possibly future?) wrote in her blog recently (https://ourisraeladventuresite.wordpress.com/ in "Panic at the Airport"), as a Christian, I should trust God to take care of us.
He always does! I think of Hebrews 11 which basically tells us to remember our history. I think of all of the care that God has provided for me in the past, and I can't deny His faithfulness. I KNOW that He'll take care of us in Germany. I KNOW that whatever we end up going through while we're over there or traveling, we won't be going through alone. He has "proven" Himself to me over and over again. But every once in a while, worry steps in. I'm not completely foolish, after all, and I understand what a big deal this is.
So it's a step of faith. I feel like I haven't stepped out in my faith in a while. Of course not! I've been busy having kids and building a family and doing things that are "safe." Who could blame me? But as I said in my first post, I've prayed and prayed about this and feel it is in God's will. So now it's time to get some work done.
It's going to be a rough 6 weeks until we get there, and then rough until 6 weeks after we move into our more permanent housing. But we'll get through it. And God will be faithful. We'll work hard, but at the same time, we'll try to enjoy these last few weeks in the States as the weather starts getting good. We're going to visit with my family and friends and see the people we love. I look forward to it.
And for this blog, I'm going to try to be real. I'm going to try not to only paint a pretty picture all the time. It's going to be over two years long, and I can't keep up a front for that long, anyway. So, here goes. Stick with me!
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| Happy Baby |
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| Alex the Knight |
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| Watching Celtic Cloggers |
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| Livvy the Tiger |
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| Little Scots |
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