In Tel Aviv

I'm in love with Tell Aviv. I really really want to go back. With my husband, God willing.

It has been a great week. From Sunday to Wednesday I had evenings only. (I say "only" as a description but not with disappointment.) My nights were full of wonder: new places, new foods, and best yet, new friends. I was paired with a Major who is a fabulous defensive driver and two wonderful female soldiers. All three of them seem to be incredibly well-traveled, highly educated, kind, noble, and gracious. Getting to know them a little bit has been the highlight of my week.

But it has been a week of highlights!!

I stayed at the Sheraton Tel Aviv, which is listed as a 5-star hotel. What makes a hotel a 5-star hotel, I wonder? Is it because it's on the beach? Because it has robes and slippers? Because it has an evening turn-down service that puts chocolates on your bed? Because it has a great breakfast? I don't know if I would call the Sheraton 5-stars, but it had all of the above. The rooms were decent, but the city itself was pretty fantastic. Trust me, I hope I can go back to that hotel someday.

The first day I did indeed get to visit the Mediterranean (so warm!) and eat some shawerma. It was a great night! The next day we went to lunch in Ashdod for some delicious falafel. I knew Ashdod was referenced in the Bible, but I had to look it up. It was mentioned many times, actually, and is the site of a very interesting story from 1 Samuel chapters 4 - 6 (go read it and don't forget!).

Looking back and thinking about that location and the story in 1 Samuel, I consider the Israelites who lost the first battle in the story and then decided to "use" the ark of the covenant to win the next battle (read it for yourself!). It makes me think about something someone said to me this week about faith and how it gives people peace and solace. And I agree. My faith in God definitely gives me peace and solace. But I have to say that this is not the main reason that I have faith. I'm not a person of faith so that I can "use" my faith to give me peace or strength or confidence or anything like that. Rather, I'm a person of faith because of who Jesus is, and because of who God is.

"Before I formed you in the womb, I knew you, and I loved you." (Jeremiah 1:5)

"Nothing can separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord." (Romans 8:38, 39, paraphrased)

"God is love, and anyone that knoweth God, loveth God." (1 John 4:7)

And to sum it up:

"We love Him because He first loved us." (1 John 4:19)

The real reason I have this faith is because God cares about me personally. This holy, righteous God took the form of a man some 2000 years ago and suffered sufferings beyond my comprehension so that I COULD have a personal relationship with Him.

In the story in 1 Samuel, the Israelites tried to use God for their gain. We sometimes do that today. Sometimes we expect God to keep us healthy, or prosperous, or safe, yet we forget what Peter said about suffering. Sometimes we are afraid to suffer, yet sometimes God uses suffering to accomplish His goals.

Here are Peter's words:

Therefore, since Christ suffered in his body, arm yourselves also with the same attitude, because whoever suffers in the body is done with sin. (1 Peter 4:1) And:
But rejoice inasmuch as you participate in the sufferings of Christ, so that you may be overjoyed when his glory is revealed.(1 Peter 4:13) And:
So then, those who suffer according to God’s will should commit themselves to their faithful Creator and continue to do good. (1 Peter 4:19)

That last verse, you will note, says, "those who suffer according to God's will", meaning that sometimes, He intends us to suffer!

My worst case scenario would be watching my kids suffer. I would suffer more if they were suffering and I couldn't help them than if I were suffering in some way specific to me. I mentioned this to Michelle (my sister) recently in an email, and she wrote this to me:

"In the old testament we see over and over again that when the Isrealites were keeping God's commands they were generally prosperous and either peaceful or blessed in their war efforts. When they turned to other gods, they suffered consequences. I think it's important to stay humble and seek God's favor during all seasons. Even then, we may suffer trials because God tests us to bring us closer to him."

Last night while packing up, I listened to Nace's (my brother's) sermon from 10 days ago titled, "Embracing Suffering." In it, he asked us to ask ourselves a very difficult question. I leave it with you now: "What am I doing today to suffer for the gospel?"

The answer for me is: I don't know? I think I'll have to get back to him on that. I mean, of course it's between me and God. And of course I want to always be doing God's will and be in His will. But I find it difficult to be in the world but not of it. It is easiest and most comfortable to rely on my current friends and family who are like-minded and (basically) love me without condition, which, in a way, separates me from the world. Instead, perhaps I need to develop some less comfortable relationships with people who are not of a similar mindset. Perhaps God is telling me it's time to step out of my comfort zone.

Perhaps He tells you the same thing?

Panorama from hotel balcony

Night-time panorama from hotel balcony

On my way to Tel Aviv

I don't know if you can imagine my emotions right now as I sit in this plane as it takes off for Tel Aviv. I am a mixture of melancholy and bubbly excitement. I know that this week is going to be a big burden on David, and it makes me sad. I also know that the kids will feel my absence, perhaps most of all Lilly, and that makes me sad, too. This is probably only my second time away from the kids for more than just a couple of nights, and leaving everyone this morning was hard. Add to that the expressions of concern for my safety I've heard from most everyone, and this trip is really making me quite sad.

But at the same time, there are things that I've greatly desired in my life but never thought would actually be possible. Or things that I've greatly desired but just not quite enough to spend the kind of money needed to get that which I desire. Seeing Israel, the home of my faith, was one of those things. And yet here I am, on my way to Tel Aviv for my first of what could be three times over the next six months. I may indeed get to walk in the same place or places as my Savior. I may get to see the port where Jonah left before getting swallowed by a big fish. I may look on the land of the prophecy in the books of Daniel or Revelations. And I will, at the very least (more than likely), get to enjoy the Mediterranean Sea and eat some shawerma tonight for dinner.

I can't believe it. I'm on the plane in flight and I still can't believe it. Because nothing in my life is more important to me than Jesus and my relationship with Him. When I read the Bible, sometimes I have to remind myself that this Man actually walked the Earth and lived a real life, so I tend to focus on the descriptions of the surroundings when given. What was His life really like? How were His interactions with the everyday people that He met?

I think of the Samaritan woman at the well at Sychar in the book of John (chapter 4). She says, "Come, see a man who told me everything I ever did." Really? We are not given very much detail about the conversation, so either she lived a very simple life and didn't get out much, or Jesus actually spent a lot of time talking with her. This is one of my favorite stories to put myself into as a fly on the wall. Imagine seeing her talking with this Rabbi. How progressive He is to be talking with her! Imagine what the disciples think as they walk up and see Him talking to her. Are they surprised? Are they angry? Or do they think, There goes that Jesus again. Always bending the rules to include somebody new.

I think of the well itself and the surrounding area. I've been in the desert before and appreciate how precious water is. In fact, after I finished my deployment to the Persian Gulf, I basically swore to myself that I would never again be in a situation where I couldn't have ice. I wonder if Jesus, who is God, felt hot and thirsty at this well and lamented not having something with which to draw the water. How familiar was He with suffering at this point? Did He already know how thirsty He would be on that day when He died for my sins?

Yes, I'm excited. Some things in life are in the realm of possible, and some are not. And sometimes, our great God moves the impossible into the realm of possible just to bless us. I feel He's done that for me today. I don't know why, nor do I need to. When I was pregnant with the twins, which I had wanted since I was about 12 years old, I struggled with why I have been so blessed in my life, pretty much my whole life, and why had God granted me what was probably my biggest desire (boy/girl twins). I really struggled. Why did He choose to bless me but not some other people in my life? I know I haven't earned those blessings, and it was actually quite a religious struggle that I was going through, mainly because I was worried those blessings were just going to be taken away from me. I finally got some peace when I got this answer: Mary, the mother of Jesus Himself, didn't ask that question. In fact, all she really said was, From now on all generations will call me blessed. So who am I to ask?

One thing about this big move to Germany is that I won't know if it was a good decision until we're safely back home. Have I said that already? I'll elaborate. This big move is not without risks. David and I think that we understand the risks and that the benefits outweigh them. But what if we're wrong? When I was pregnant with the twins and worrying so much that it was too good to be true and something bad was going to happen, I received another answer that also gave me peace, and it continues to give me peace everyday. I know, and some of my friends and relatives who have already suffered a great deal know this too, that whatever suffering I am called to do, I will not be doing alone. I know that my amazing Savior, whose footsteps I may get to retrace this week, will always be there for me and carry me through if I need Him to.

This is all because of Jesus. As I've been saying so often already, I am grateful.

I checked into the hotel. Somebody is going to have to pinch me.